Arabella is Turning 2!

arabella and her friend, olivia

one of my close friends asked me if i would be willing take some pictures of her daughter for her 2nd birthday.  can you  imagine what my response was? 

YES!

we had such a great time putting this shoot together.  my girlfriend knew she wanted to do an "olivia" theme so the pictures would coordinate with arabella's birthday party.  that was our jumping off point.

from the balloons to the cupcakes to the colors.  we had a great time and arabella thought she was getting an early birthday party prepared just for her.  well, she was!

the great thing about turning 2 is arabella is still considered a baby... but she is also getting into the "big girl" stage.  she has such a strong spirit.  this girl knows what she wants and can think for herself already.  i imagine her to be a very independent young lady when she grows up.  and that's going to be a good thing.

happy birthday, arabella!

arabella, i hope you have a wonderful party.  i am so glad i got to celebrate a little early with you and our friend, olivia.  thank you for sharing those yummy cupcakes with me.  it was a joy to spend the afternoon with you and your mommy!

i need to give a special shout-out to my wingman, sandra.  she helped us keep arabella entertained and as always was a huge help during the shoot.  thank you from the bottom of my heart.  

xox,aj

Hitting the Wall : Chapter 2

monday came and i hit the wall.  as i struggled to get my limbs to respond to what my brain was telling them to do the pain washed over me.  i got scared.  very scared.  this isn't right.  this does not feel right.  something is wrong with my body.  all of my body.  there was not one joint that had been spared from this intense pain. 

my husband sprang into action.  "in sickness and in health," - boy, they weren't kidding.  he had to physically help me out of bed.  help me to the bathroom. get me into the shower.  wash me, dry me and dress me in my clothes.  every movement made my body scream. 

right away my children were aware something was wrong with mommy.  "you don't feel good?" my daughter asked looking up at me.  my son softly kissed me and rubbed my arm.  "does that make you feel better?"  he asked.  i felt my heart break in two when i recognized the worry on their sweet little faces. they should not be worrying about me. i am the mom.  it is my job to worry about them.  

thankfully we have amazing neighbors and our kids went to stay across the street.  my husband drove me straight back to my doctor's office and we waited until the front doors were unlocked.  no appointment. no warning.  we just showed up.  his staff was visibly surprised to see me back; it had only been a few days since i was there last.  the doctor even gave me a funny look when he walked into the exam room and saw me sitting there again.  i tried hard to hold back the tears but they came anyway while i explained to the doctor why i had returned.  

"it's like she turned 90 years old over night" my husband told him in disbelief. 

my general practitioner talked a little more about the results of what would be my first blood test.  he advised me the diabetic reading was high.  "now, i'm not saying you are a diabetic but i don't want you to have problems with that in the future.  so let's do some preventative maintenance right now by loosing 5-10 pounds.  even i could afford to do that." he chuckled.  not funny, mister doctor. i am not in the mood for humor.

he continued: "you need to drink lots of water. your kidneys look like they are having some trouble and i want to make sure we are flushing them out real good.  your liver too."

so.... you want me to loose weight, drink 3 gallons of water a day and i'll feel better? 

i could tell the doctor was still a little skeptical until he saw me try to get down off the exam table.  my husband wrapped his arm around my waist and lowered me onto the ground.  he continued to support my weight as we made our way toward the door.  the problem with this connective tissue disease is that ALL of the tissues that connect every flexing joint in your body hurt like an s.o.b.  

the doctor's eyes grew wide and his mouth opened.  

"do you always walk like that?  you didn't look like this last week." he stammered.

"that is what i've been trying to tell you." i cried.  "this isn't me. my body is not doing what i tell it to do." i sounded like a toddler whining to him.

my doctor referred us to a rheumatologist.  you see, i was under the impression that a rheumatologist studied rheumatoid arthritis.  yes and no.  i had tested positive for a connective tissue disease.  there are several diseases within this connective tissue disease family.  rheumatoid arthritis and lupus are only some of them. my doctor ordered additional blood tests to investigate the connective tissue disease, gave me a prescription for tramadol (a pain medication) and encouraged me to go home and rest.  

there was no going home yet. we had things to do.  first call was to the rheumatologist for an appointment.  the first office did not have an available appointment for over 2 months.  that's not going to work.  the next doctor we called had an available appointment, but of course it would be several weeks before he would be able to see me. "i'll take it."  then i vowed to call his office every day to see if an earlier appointment became available.  yes, i can be very annoying like that.

next stop: the lab for more blood work. 

"hello again" the technician said when i shuffled in. since i had turned 90 years old overnight, it's not like i was moving very fast.  "more tests?" he asked.

i used to be afraid of needles.  we didn't get along - needles and i. but today was different. 

i was scared of what was happening to my body and i was determined to find out what was causing this craziness and get it fixed.

after the lab we hit the pharmacy for those pain meds. yes, give me pills.  if they make me feel better, give them to me now. while my husband went in to the pharmacy and took care of business, i sat in the car.  what else could i be doing to better my situation? i can't just sit here and wait around for something to happen.  i knew i could only control certain aspects of my situation.  one of them was my diet.  "loose 5-10 pounds" played over in my mind.  ugh.... but he kind of had a point.  if i ate healthy; if i ate "clean" my body might operate more efficiently and therefore be able to heal itself better. right? 

another light bulb went on: acupuncture.  hmm? i had never done acupuncture before.  remember what i said about me and needles?  yeah, well this time things are different.  i would have set my hair on fire and run down the street if it meant i would get some relief from the pain.

i called my chiropractor's office and promptly made an acupuncture appointment for later that afternoon.  scared, sore, anxious and in pain i shuffled into the chiropractic office.  once again, the office staff and patients in the waiting room turned to look at the 90 year old shuffling through the door.  i was quickly escorted to a private room and my consultation began.  

"i don't know what's going on with you, but i am very worried. are you nervous?" she asked.

"yes. very." i filled her in on all of the events leading up to me coming to see her.  she diligently took notes and nodded appropriately. i also presented her with a copy of my first blood test.  she read them thoroughly and shook her head.  

"it looks like your body basically exploded and you have inflammation everywhere." 

i asked her if she could recommend any type of nutrition or dietary restrictions for me.  she encouraged a cleanse diet - not to loose weight, but more to rid my body of all the processed foods and ick that might be deterring it from performing its normal duties. (kidneys? liver?? are you listening this?)  ok, i can do that.  another vow for the day: eat fresh fruit and vegetables, lean meats and plenty of protein. stay away from crap. 

for the next two hours i laid on the bed in that private room.  the lights were dim.  soft, soothing music played in the background and i realized as she stuck needles into my body that i was finally pain free.  could it really be? or am i hallucinating?  no, it was really happening.  occasionally i would feel a pinch when she put a needle in place but the sensation quickly went away.  i felt at peace. most of all, i felt like she was listening to me and hearing what my body was saying.

my first acupuncture treatment was strictly to help manage my pain.  when she finished the 2 hour treatment, she encouraged me to go home and take an epsom salt bath then get some rest.  i did just that.  while relaxing i was hit with the reality that i needed to ask for help.  this might not be a big deal for some people, but it was a huge deal for me.  i prided myself on being fiercely independent and now i was going to have to swallow my pride.   i stared at the fact i would not be able to care for myself and my 2 kids when my husband went off to work early the next morning.  i picked up the phone and dialed a number.

my husband had to assist me with walking out of the chiropractic  office, getting into the car and moving up the stairs.  but when the time came to go to bed i felt a little better. i had some slight relief.  the day's events had drained me - mentally, physically and emotionally.  i was hopeful the next day would be even better.  or maybe i was just naive that i would wake up and be magically cured.  oh to be so lucky...

Going From 100 mph To a Dead Stop

a recent personal struggle has reared its ugly head and i thought i would share.  i figured maybe writing about my experience would be a form of therapy for me. additionally, i am learning that there are a lot of people going through the same thing and maybe we could learn from and help each other.

on july 14 i woke up and started my morning like i always do - sort of.  when i moved to get out of bed it was obvious something was wrong with my hands.  my fingers had swelled up and i had a difficult time removing my wedding ring.  i also had difficulty making a fist.  my first inclination was to wonder:  am i going to start my period? crap, i hope not.  then i began reviewing the previous day's meals.  did i eat too much salt? or drown myself in sodium?  

no, not that i could recall.  at the time, i decided i needed to exercise like i usually did.  i told myself i needed to get moving and i would feel better.  that was partially true.  i even commented to my girlfriend while working out that my hands were sore.  she had the same questions i did.  strange.  

for another 2 weeks, i awoke with similar symptoms.  i always felt worse in the morning and would gradually start to feel better as they day progressed.  the swelling and pain had started to affect more than my hands.  my right shoulder was sore.  my big toe, both ankles, and pads of my feet ached and had become  painful to the touch.  i had stopped exercising. i no longer jogged up to 5 miles - 4 days a week.  enough of this; i could only suck it up for so long and frankly, i was tired of the pain.  i decided to go see my doctor. besides, i had a softball tournament in las vegas coming up and i was not going to miss out on that!

thankfully, a girlfriend agreed to watch my 2 little people and i headed to my first doctor's appointment on august 1st.  my joints were still painfully sore when i went in to the see my general practitioner but i figured he would be a good place to start. the doctor checked the usual: my blood pressure (it was higher than usual), my pulse, my weight (ugh) , ears, eyes, etc and took a brief look at the joints that bothered me.  after a deep inquisition into my family history, he really had no idea what was happening.  there were so many symptoms that he needed to narrow down the playing field, so to speak.   according to him, i could have been experiencing anything from lyme disease to rheumatoid arthritis.  he prescribed celebrex to help with the inflammation, an oral antibiotic "just in case" i tested positive for lyme disease and sent me to the lab for numerous blood tests.

four days later i was on my way to las vegas with my girlfriends. honestly, i had hesitated to go on the trip. my husband and i talked about it.  i also spoke with the coach who was a close friend.  we decided i would go and have a fun trip with my friends but play only as needed and when i felt good enough to do so.  that is exactly what i did.  additionally, i made sure to make healthy food choices while i was away.   on day two of my trip my general practitioner called with my blood work results.  he normally did not give this type of information over the phone but he knew i was out of town and anxious for some information.  he advised me to stop taking the antibiotics because i had tested negative for lyme disease.  {wheww!}  he was, however concerned about a positive abnormality showing up on one of the blood tests.  i clearly remember him telling me: "now, don't freak out.  i do not want you to worry about this but a small percentage of people who test positive eventually get diagnosed with lupus." 

there it was. the bomb in my gut hit hard and heavy.  then a little voice in my head started repeating: "you are going to be fine. you are always fine. there are plenty of tests that come back with a false-positive. this is no big deal." 

my friends and i made the 4 hour drive home from las vegas on sunday, august 7.  i knew when we stopped halfway through the trip that i was in trouble.  my joints had stiffened even more.  i had difficulty getting in and out of the car.  once i arrived home, i was relieved to be with my husband and children.  i could try to relax and do my best to rest before having to go to work early the following morning.  or so i thought... the next morning proved to be the next chapter in my newest challenge.

Hooray for Pre-K!

1st day of pre-k

this week my son started his pre-kindergarten class.  i love his school.  he has been attending the same preschool for just over a year now but somehow THIS first day got me a little emotional.  he begins his last year of preschool; sort of an end to a chapter, so to speak.  next year, kindergarten will be a big step for him. (and for me, too.)  it is so important that he savor every moment of being a kid.  

having fun.  learning new things.  laughing - a lot.  making new friends.  

i love this face

lately my son has been asking me what it's like to be an adult.  he tells me he wants to be grown up.  my response is usually: "well, i wish i could be a kid again. i'll trade ya!"  he just laughs and tells me i am being silly.  yea i guess it is silly but it's true sometimes. i tried to explain that adults have something called responsibilities but i don' think he quite gets it and that's ok.

my son had a hard time understanding that some of his friends from last year had graduated preschool and started kindergarten.  because of where his birthday lands in the year we opted to wait an extra year and start him in kindergarten when he is 5 - going on 6.  we are comfortable with that decision but he had difficulty grasping it.   he started his new class this week and loves it.  he is excited about his new friends and activities.  it helped him to know he is now considered one of the "big" kids at school.  he feels very proud to be one of the upper class men of preschool who will head off to kindergarten next fall.

son, enjoy your time at preschool.  don't worry, you will be big soon enough.  each chapter in your life is a journey.  i have loved watching you grow during this journey and look forward to watching you in the years to come.  promise me you'll stay sweet, be a good boy, but most of all have fun and soak up every minute.  i love you.  

xoxo, mom (aka: aj) 

Have My Cake & Eat It Too

every once in a while i get to have my cake and eat it, too.  this past weekend i was lucky enough to do just that.  i assisted kamee june photography with hosting her "small business workshop" and soaked up some education from an amazing teacher.  other photographers looking to build their businesses got their learn-on and at the end of the day we were treated to a stylized shoot.  what a treat, indeed!!  our theme for the afternoon was "beach-y" and boy, was it HOT!  our model, justine serrano is gorgeous inside and out.  this girl does not take a bad picture.  

the glamor - hair and makeup was all handled by our stylist, jessica hale-fredrick.  

needless to say, the afternoon flew by.  everyone at the workshop gained some serious knowledge from kamee june.  it was uplifting to see these photographers work with each other, learn from each other and network together.  so inspiring!  hope some of the pictures i snapped inspire you, too.

just a peek...

who says there's no beach in corona?

love this sunlight.  it looks like butter.

a HUGE thank you to kamee june photography for allowing me to work with you.  i am grateful for the opportunity to be mentored by someone with your talent and even more appreciative of  your friendship.

jessica - can you make me look this good??  seriously,... your knack for beauty is awesome!

justine - you are a sweet, intelligent and beautiful young woman - so refreshing to be around.  i really look forward to working with you again.

everyone who attended the workshop - did you have as much fun as i did?!??  i learned SO much and ran home to plug in my camera and check out my shots.  thank you for letting me be a part of your day.  i was enlightened by all of you and learned a little something from everyone.  here's to watching your businesses grow!  best of luck to all of you.  

xoxo,aj

Pie in a Jar Thank You Gifts

The Cake Dish: Pie in a Jar Thank You Gifts:  

ok, seriously?? I am going home to make these tonight! these are absolutely adorable for teacher gifts, gifts for a sweet neighbor, baby shower gifts, mailman / UPS guy gifts - just about anyone for any time of year! slap some cute ribbon and color coordinate to your theme and there ya go!  think of the endless possibilities you have with these treats.

found these while i was "pinning" this morning and suddenly had an urge to eat pie! ... in a jar. :)

this idea is compliments of http://thefrugalgirls.com who originally received it from jenn at the cake dish.  (isn't it crazy how the domino effect is amplified on the web??  i love it. sometimes.)

my boy starts school this week and his teachers (miss jenn and miss karen, if you're reading this i apologize for spoiling your surprise) are going to receive these goodies.

happy labor day everyone! hope you are finding something fun and fantastic to do on this last day of summer.

xoxo, aj

Cousins

cousins

we spent the day at my mother in law's house yesterday and it was so relaxing.  my niece and nephew don't live far from her and as soon as they got out of school they joined us.  the heat drove my people straight into the pool. i know they were thankful for a refreshing splash together.  i enjoyed watching them having fun with their cousins.  it got me thinking about my own cousins and our relationship.  as i watched my little people splash and play with their cousins in the pool, i thought about how grateful i am that they are going to know their cousins.  both my niece and nephew have been a part of my kids' lives since before they were even born.  my niece's birthday is one day before my daughter's birthday.  all the kids play so well together.  it's good, clean honest fun with genuine belly laughs.  i get a big smile on my face watching them. 

i love feet.  they are cute. and no one ever has the same exact pair. 

they giggle.  they tell jokes. they look out for each other. they help each other. they give hugs and kisses to each other.  they genuinely love each other and love being with each other.  that makes me so happy.

unfortunately my cousins and i lived in completely different states growing up.  with my father in the military we bounced from coast to coast.  we did not have the opportunity to grow up "with" our cousins.  i used to be envious of the kids who had these huge extended families.  they would roll their eyes when telling me about another family gathering with 20+ people there.  i used to want that.  thankfully, we are continuing to nurture the relationships with my cousins and get to know them as young adults.  we tease and beg them to move closer.  they are very special.  i know if we had lived closer to them growing up that we would have had a relationship much like my kids do with their cousins.  

helping her learn to hull-a-hoop

ice cream is a right of passage, for sure and a summertime must-have!

i look forward to the summer time when i know we'll get to see my niece and nephew more often.  have them over to swim or spend the night.  my kids really look forward to this too.  it's important for kiddos to know their family.  know who loves them.  and later in life, when things get tough my hope is that they turn to their family when they need strength.  all of that starts now, building those relationships when they are young.  

my niece, growing up so fast

my nephew, the ladies are going to love those eyes one day!

there is another reason for me being so emotional about this.  i am recently a "new" auntie.  our newest addition - my niece - is coming to cali tomorrow.  my youngest brother and his wife are moving back to the west coast with their brand new baby.  i could not be more excited!!  almost like a kid at christmas.  not only do i get to have my little brother and his amazing wife living closer but we also get to spend quality time with their new baby.  one more cousin for kiddos to play with.  to get to know.  to laugh with. to make memories with.  this is what it's all about for me.

Sisters: Sydney and Alex

  

"hey,... i've got a favor to ask of you." my friend, kim says while i am over visiting her one afternoon.
"what's up?" i ask.
"will you take sydney's senior pictures?"
i looked up at her in disbelief.  you want ME to take your daughter's senior high school portraits??? really??
"YES!" i jumped at the opportunity.
"of course i'd love to get pictures with both of my girls." she smiled at me.
"not a problem. i can't wait!! let's pick a date." and so we did.


a couple weeks later kim, sydney, alex and i met up to do some pictures of them.  we planned out where the pictures would be taken and what they would wear.  it was really fun to do this with them.  on the day of the shoot i had my trusty "wing man" sandra with me.  i love having her around.  she has a calming spirit and i love to hear her view and  opinions on what we are shooting.


now let me back up a little bit.  my friend kim is one of the first people i met when my husband and i moved to corona.  the stars were aligned just right because she and i were meant to be friends.  the moment i met kim, there was an instant connection. she has a warm heart and very giving spirit.  through kim, i have gotten to know her two amazing daughters: sydney and alex.  these girls are good.  they babysit my little people and i genuinely enjoy being around them both.  when they were younger, they looked so much alike that i would have sworn they were twins.  honestly, sometimes i had a hard time telling who was who. but in these last few years somethings have changed.  each girl is coming into her own and becoming their own woman; very much so.


alex is the younger sister; a junior in high school and she is an artist.

alex has a spirit much like her mother's.  she loves color and i've seen her with a paintbrush in her hands more times than i can count.  one night some of the ladies were visiting at kim's house and alex joined us.  she set up her easel and canvas and began to paint.  it was awesome to watch her talent create something extraordinary.

alex's decorating style is eclectic.  she has drawings covering almost every wall in her bedroom. and many of her favorite quotes are strewn on those walls as well.  i love that she knows exactly who she is and what her passion is at such a young age.  i envy that a little bit because at her age, i was still searching.

alex, keep that passion alive.  nurture it.  you are a budding young artist.  i hope you find a college that  encourages you to blossom into the artiste i know you will become.  i'm excited to watch where your talent takes you.

sydney just started her senior year of high school.  YIKES!  time has flown by watching her grow into such an intelligent and beautiful young lady.

sydney

sydney is quiet, intellectual, spiritual and loyal to her friends and family.  she is also very simple.  this girl does not get excited about the idea of putting on a pretty dress and getting all gussied up.  but she was a good sport and did it for us anyway.

give this girl her jeans and a pair of converse and she is happy.  isn't she a pretty scholar?  look at those books.  i know her brain is bubbling over with all that knowledge.

sydney, i love that you play a weekly game of monopoly with 4 of your closest friends.

i love that  you are a vintage soul who collects antiques and old vinyl records.  all teasing aside, i know your sister and your mom adore you.  how could they not? you are easy to adore.  this last year of high school is going to go by so quickly.  i know it doesn't feel like it right now, but it will.  my wish for you is that you soak up every minute.  have as much fun as possible and of course, get good grades. :)  this is the beginning of the end to a chapter for you and the next chapter - college life - is a whole new adventure. 

sisters playing "dress up"
growing up, i had always wished for a sister. i got 2 crazy brothers and used to dress the youngest one up like a girl - remember that, brian? - but if i had a sister, i would've wanted our relationship to be as solid as sydney and alex's is.

sydney, kim , and alex

the fact that these girls have their heads on straight is due largely in part to their awesome, kim and their mellow dad, tim.  you both have a done an amazing job of raising these two girls into amazing young women.  they give me hope for our future and my little people's future.  they are a bright light.  

good luck girls!!  

Applique All The Way! [I sound like a cheerleader in high school]

for those of you who know me , you know that i LOVE to make and receive homemade gifts.  i love making goodies for people and watching them open those gifts.  i love making things for my children and seeing them wear it.  

last year when i went part-time at work i started making even more gifts for my friends and family.  like many of you know our life goes in cycles.  right now i am in the "mommy cycle" so most of my friends are having babies, have just had babies or our kiddos play together.
do you remember the last post with sadie's lemonade stand?  i made her shirt with the number 1 on it. (if you were here, you'd see my big proud grin)  
to be honest, all those birthday parties and baby showers get crazy and expensive.  that's when i decided a homemade and heartfelt gift was the way i wanted to go.... hence learning to applique.  

this cute tie applied to a onesie is the perfect gift for a baby boy

with a lot of trial and error and some research on the internet, i taught myself how to make appliques.  you can applique any design.  you can put them on onesies, t-shirts, bibs, aprons - on just about anything.  i made a few (ok, A LOT) and learned as i went.  now that i've done it so many times, i finally have a system in place and my work flows pretty easily.  check it out and try one for yourself. 

here are the items you will need to make your own applique:

- design or letter of your choice (simpler is better)

- pencil or pen for tracing

- iron

- fusible webbing (i use wonder under)

- cute cotton fabric

- t shirt, onesie or whatever items you want to applique onto

- thread

- scissors

**note: i wash, dry and lightly iron each piece of fabric and garment before i start this process.


set your iron to medium/high with no steam. iron the fusible webbing to the fabric you have chosen for this project.  i use only the amount i need for the design to conserve my supplies.  only rest your iron on the fusible webbing/fabric for about 8-10 seconds. and be careful not to slide the iron.  

the fusible webbing bonds to the fabric

once you've selected a design, trace it onto the webbing-side of the paper that you have bonded to the fabric. cut out your design. ** this is the old school way of doing things.  if you have a cri-cut die cut machine or a silhouette, this part will be much easier for you.

select your design. trace onto wonder under-backed fabric and cut out.

when you have completely cut out your design, peel away the backing layer of the fusible webbing.  your fabric should have a distinctive texture on the back of it.  place your design wherever you like it on your clothing item- bonded side down.   with the iron still set at medium/high and no steam, place the iron on top of the design for 8-10 seconds.  lift the iron and repeat - set the iron on the remaining portion of the design for another 8-10 seconds.  again, be careful not to slide the iron or your design may move and become wrinkled.

iron set to medium/high and NO steam

the fusible webbing has bonded your design to the clothing item.  however, if you're looking for a little bit a stronger hold you can sew around the edges of the design.  i like to do this because that way i am confident the design won't peel off when i wash it and it looks super cute with some colorful stitching.

you can stitch by hand - the sloppier, the better sometimes - or use a sewing machine.  

stitch around your design

i use my grandmother's old sewing machine.  i took it to a local vacuum cleaner and sewing machine repair place.  the guy was great and gave it a tune-up at a decent price. when using the sewing machine, you can use a straight stitch or a zig zag stitch.  either one is cute. if you're asking for my opinion, i prefer the straight stitch because it's easier to do and the finished product looks "cleaner."  additionally, be careful that your clothing doesn't get all bunched up and you wind up sewing the front of the shirt  to the back of the shirt.

yes, my name is amanda and i have done this.

see how the shirt is pulled up so that i'm only sewing on one layer.

go around all sides of your design.  when finished, snip your threads and there you go! wrap up your homemade goodies in a cute bag with a big bow.  your friends will love them and you will feel good knowing you've made something from the heart for those whom you love.  

let me know if you try this; i'd love to hear how it goes!  

if you're not the martha stewart-type, then shoot me an email and i'd be happy to sew one of these beauties up for you at a very reasonable price!

just a few little goodies i'm working on right now